Every day when I check my website for what searches have been done I come across some that I want to respond to. Today I’m responding to the person that searched for, “My husband doesn’t believe in fibromyalgia”. To this person all I can do is say that I’m sorry you find yourself in that situation.
Unfortunately many family members and even some physicians still believe that fibromyalgia doesn’t exist. It doesn’t matter how many studies you point out to them; it doesn’t matter how much you ache; it doesn’t matter how badly you hurt when you’re touched; it doesn’t matter how much sleep you lose because of pain; it doesn’t matter how hard you have to concentrate on what you’re doing or you’ll screw it up; and it doesn’t matter that you can’t remember the most simple things sometimes. There will always be some individuals that think you’re faking, are lazy, or just don’t want to do something you’re supposed to. To them I say, “Walk a day in my shoes, then tell me fibromyalgia doesn’t exist!!”.
Is fibromyalgia real. For those of us who live with it, it’s the most real thing in our lives 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. When I try to tell someone how I feel I usually get sympathy, often get “how can I help”, sometime just get the look that says, “yeah, right”. Because I don’t ‘look sick’ I must not be; but, I’m probably just looking for sympathy, feeling sorry for myself, or am lazy. Sound familiar? Dealing with and describing an invisible illness isn’t easy for any of us.
Education is the key. We need to continue to get information out, share our experiences, find or create support groups that we can fall back on with our own questions and concerns. The enclosed link will take you to an on line support group that I like to visit. You can pose your questions, visit blogs, enter discussions, and gather information. You can remain anonymous if you like, just create a screen name.
To the person who searched by, “My husband doesn’t believe in fibromyalgia”, I would suggest giving him some websites to visit that explain exactly what fibromyalgia is. I would also have him go to your doctor with you. I would have him go to this support group site so he can see for himself that others have questions and concerns about this disease. It is now believed that 1 in 50 Americans have fibromyalgia and most of them are women. This link will take you to a site that lists these statistics along with other information you might find useful. The more information you can give your husband the more he’ll understand the disease and perhaps won’t wonder; is fibromyalgia real? I wish you and anyone else going through this.
I told my own husband that yours doesn’t believe fibromyalgia is real. All he did was shake his head. My husband acknowledged something was wrong almost 18 years ago when I kept coming home from work so sore and tired I couldn’t do much around the house and, heaven forbid, he’d want to go out on a weekend. This behavior wasn’t like me at all and he KNEW that there was a problem. We were both relieved when I actually got a diagnosis and a good doctor that would work with me to find the right combination of medications, exercise, and rest that does me the most good…I wish I still had that doctor.
I had to change when we moved from Wisconsin to Florida. Here my doctor wants to reinvent the wheel. He’s been messing around with my medications for three months and I’m not liking the results. We’re going to have a discussion when I see him later this month. He either works with me or he’s fired, plain and simple. Anyway, that’s another story all together. Just know that your doctor can help educate your husband or anyone else you want to take to an appointment with you. Hang in there.
Is fibromyalgia real? You and I along with the thousands of others that suffer with it know it is. It’s up to us to educate the rest of the world.
Is fibromyalgia real